Thursday, November 17, 2005

American Tie

Having spent some time talking about a couple of fictional presidents (and I've got plans to do one more fairly soon), I decided I should pull out a piece I wrote back when the actual presidential election of 2000 went so terribly wrong. I should emphasize that this was written before the actual election results had been decided, and so, although the parody is meant to be read from the standpoint of after the results were a fait accompli, the last few lines of the third verse could in fact have worked just as well with Al Gore, had the situation turned out differently.

American Tie
(A parody written to the tune of Don McLean's American Pie)
by B-W of Transforming Seminarian

Not so long ago,
We can all remember how the voting ended in a tie.
And we knew if they had their chance,
That we would see the lawyers dance,
And they would be so happy, for a while.
For while the lawsuits started mounting,
Florida kept on recounting.
Always redefining
Intentions still divining.
I can't remember if they tried
To listen to the other side.
Because the diff'rence seemed so wide
The year, the voting tied.

And they were singing,
My, my, this election won't die
We've been doing all this suing
But we're still in a tie
With all the chaos making us want to cry
Saying, "Who will be our president guy?"
"Who will be our president guy?"

Did you watch the news that night,
How election figures were so tight?
If Dan Rather told you so.
Did you see how Oregon
Couldn't ever tell us who had won?
Because they did their counting, so slow-oh-oh-oh.
Well, I know they told us Dubya won,
and I heard that Gore gave concession.
They both trusted the news
But they couldn't read the clues
That the pollsters were too quick to say
That Bush had won the vote that day
And so they all had hell to pay
The year, the voting tied.

And they were singing,
My, my, this election won't die
We've been doing all this suing
But we're still in a tie
With all the chaos making us want to cry
Saying, "Who will be our president guy?"
"Who will be our president guy?"

I met a man who voted twice
And so they put his vote on ice
Unfairly, some would later say.
I went down to the counting floor
Where ballots counted twice before
Were examined, and recounted, day by day.
And in the streets, the people screamed.
The protesters looked really steamed.
But neither guy recanted.
The voters, disenchanted.
And the guy who won was hurt the most
After all that, he couldn't boast
Because his reputation's toast.
The year, the voting tied.

And they were singing,
My, my, this election won't die
We've been doing all this suing
But we're still in a tie
With all the chaos making us want to cry
Saying, "Who will be our president guy?"
"Who will be our president guy?"

My, my, this election won't die
We've been doing all this suing
But we're still in a tie
With all the chaos making us want to cry
Saying, "Who will be our president guy?"

No comments:

Post a Comment

LinkWithin

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...